I say . . .
Wake up when I want.
Have my coffee in a garden with
roses. Plant some petunias and then sit in a shady spot to read, write or
draw.
To have someone who loves me
find me there and be content to talk to me for however long I want.
To not have to worry about money
for bills.
To know that money will come
from … a painting that I sold because I was happy with the outcome, and not
embarrassed and unsure and insecure, from a book that I wrote and could relax
knowing that readers will be able to relate to and enjoy. Or from art classes
where I help women find contentment and kids have fun.
At times I almost wish I could
be “institutionalised” to be in a place where there is no pressure, no
deadlines, no deliverables, no commitments. I think sometimes I wouldn’t mind
being put away and chemically numbed …it would be a welcome break from … from
all the things that cause me pain and anxiety.
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