So . . . two janaazas (funerals) in one week. Sunday night
an aunt who lived with my parents passed on, and on Wednesday night we
received news that my Gran’s sister had passed on. So one has to pause and
acknowledge that there’s really no escaping the reaper. I don’t fear death. I’m
cool with one day waking up to find that I didn’t really wake up and wasn’t likely
to ever again. What I do worry about it is my mother dying. I mean, I accept
that logically, because she is my mother, she is older than me, and will in all likelihood
move along some time before me (though nothing is cast in stone). But the
thought of not having her around is both scary and depressing. I’m a grown
woman of 30+ (no need to get technical about such stuff), but when I have a
tummy ache, when one of my kids have a tummy ache, or even when no one I know
has a tummy ache, I call my mom for advice. I call her for help with recipes I’ve
made hundreds of times because she’s made them thousands of times. I call her
to share my good news, my bad news and of course when there’s juicy news. Heck,
she’s usually where I get the juicy news.
Don’t get me wrong, she can drive me insane at times too. But
even that I’ll miss when she’s no longer there.
I guess there’s nothing I can do but enjoy and appreciate
the time I have with her now. I do realise that I am lucky to have her in my
life still.
Guess what!?! She just called to tell me she made a huge pot
of soup. See why I love this woman. She rocks!
As someone whose parents have already passed on I am more freaked out of passing on while my kids are small and I will not be there to help and protect them.
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